I haven't been very attentive to my blogging lately; that and my art.
Back in December I decided that I wanted to get lap band surgery. That's where they surgically put an inflatable ring around the top of your stomach to limit the amount of food that you can eat at any one time. It doesn't magically cure you from overeating, but it is a tool that assists you do that.
Since deciding to do that, I have been pretty singularly focused on that goal. Being an online sort of girl, I researched the web like crazy. And I still am. Not surprisingly, there is a huge community of people who are doing or have done the same thing.
I had to jump through an unimaginable number of hoops to get approved and then prepared for the surgery, but I succeeded. My surgery is Wednesday morning, early.
Whenever I mention it to folks, usually one of their first questions is "Are you going to tell people?" I understand the reason for the question. Lots of people keep weight loss surgery quiet. They find it embarrassing that they have had to resort to such a thing. I asked everyone I could think of who might have an educated opinion on the subject what they thought. Mostly the opinion was that honesty was the easiest way and that by telling, it could benefit others with the same issues. Finally, I asked myself if people realized that I was overweight. The answer was "without a doubt." Then I asked myself if using a tool to help myself lose weight was cheating, and I decided it wasn't.
I've been dieting since I was 13. That's almost 40 years. I'd say I gave regular dieting a pretty darned good chance.
I found out about 30 years ago that I had hypothyroidism. That's something I may have had for much longer. Often, when doctors see a heavy person with physical problems, they assume that the weight is the problem, not a symptom of a problem. That undiagnosed hypothyroidism probably would have killed me given a tiny bit more time. I had cholesteral over 400. I couldn't walk more than a block without my muscles seizing up on me. I couldn't keep a thought straight in my head. I bloated unimaginably. The list went on and on. I was convinced that I had hardening of the arteries because so many of the symptoms were similar. And this was when I was in my 20's! Finally, my mother-in-law demanded that I go to another doctor. As soon as that doctor laid eyes on me, he gave me the correct diagnosis. He put me on the proper meds and my life started turning around.
Turned around mostly, but not completely. I've had my metabolism tested twice. It shows that if I consume over 1350 calories in a day, I gain weight. Most women have a burn rate of 1800 calories a day. That means that while most women can have three good meals and some snacks in a day, I could only get two meals. So, I have to work harder than most people to keep weight off, and then my body penalizes me if I do it by making me perpetually hungry. So is getting a tool that will only allow me to eat so much, cheating? I don't see it that way. I see it as a way to get from behind that danged eight ball I've been behind my whole life.
So anyway, I am so very excited about getting the lap band put in. It would be nice to have other things to think about besides my weight.